Alone

Connor

I am incredibly alone. It’s my fault. I made my life like this. I had friends. I had them for as long as I can remember and then I destroyed those friendships this year. I dont know why I did it either. I said stuff, did stuff, got in fights with them until they wouldn’t even acknowledge me. I did the same thing to my little brother. My older brother hates me as result. My mom is dead. My dad is hardly around because of work. I’m alone. Isolated from everyone because I hurt them all. I guess I can’t fake being ok anymore. I want my friends back, my brothers back, and I dont think it will ever happen

BlackParadePixie

I would say it doesn’t hurt to start with a few apologies. Sometimes people can be more forgiving than you expect.

Maseb

Apologizing is the first step, as well asking if they can forgive you. But you have to change how you treat people or it won’t matter. If you do it again you may lose them forever. Do you have anyone you can talk to about your feelings? A trusted adult at school maybe?

Connor

I’ve been trying to take your advice and apologize to some of my old friends. The ones I thought might have a tiny chance of hearing me out at least but they aren’t replying or even giving any sign they read the messages. My brothers think I’m full of crap and it’s just a trick to hurt them again. I don’t think anyone is going to trust me enough again to forgive me. There are adults at my school but I dont have any type of trusting relationship with them. I trust them slightly more than I would a stranger on the street since they won’t kidnap me at least. I’ll keep at apologizing though. Once school starts maybe I won’t feel so isolated and alone getting being around people again at least

Maseb

Connor

I wish you luck

after_the_rain333

Connor, that sounds really hard. I can’t even begin to fathom what you are going through, but I can be your friend. I’m sorry about your mom. I’m not going to say it will be okay because I don’t the people who you are talking about so I don’t know how they will respond. However, like other people have said, if you have not already, apologize. There is really only so much you can do. Just be patient as forgiveness takes time. Like, a lot of time. But it will get better. I promise