So uh… basically I love sex and that kind of thing but whenever I masturbate I always feel guilty and deppressed and like a bad person after, I dont know when this started but at some point I just started to get disgusted by myself and its been really hard to just experiment and be a regular 14 year old when I get disgusting and filled with self hate everytime I masturbate or watch porn, does anybody know what to do and how to get over this? because as much as I wish I was asexual im not and I need pleasure, I need to get over this.. I think it might have started just as I have matured and seen how truly disgusting and horrible people can get, as ive gotten older ive become more aware of how truly disgusting people can be with sexual things and sometimes I get scared I will become that? I know its irrational because I know I would never do anything like that but I still get scared I will, even though I have no evidence to believe I will, that shit doesnt turn me on it just disgusts me.

Ok, I am answering this on the assumption that you are male. I would say the first thing to know is that when we cum hormones are released into the blood with the effect that we are suddenly more relaxed and not horny any more. When I first started getting horny, and responded by masturbating, it felt like something had taken over my brain and driven me to masturbate then, once I’d cum, everything was back to normal and the horniness seemed like a temporary disturbance. That isn’t the same thing as being depressed or guilty, though. Of course, over time, I got used to the horniness being something that was here to stay, so the state of being horny and wanting to do something that made me cum, whether that was masturbation or sex, was actually just as normal as not being horny. Then, as you’ve discovered, being horny is something that is very hard to resist. If it were easy to resist, our species would probably have died out some time ago. So what happens is that, whatever views we have picked up about sexual things in general, or masturbation in particular, we still get horny and it still drives us to do it then, after we’ve cum, the horniness disappears and we are back in touch with whatever we were taught about sex and masturbation. So, if we have picked up generally positive views about sex and masturbation, that period after cumming can be one of relaxation and contentment, whereas if we have picked up negative views about sex, or masturbation in particular, that period after cumming is when we might feel guilty. So, as we can’t really decide to ignore being horny, the only way out of feeling guilty after cumming, is to work though any negative ideas we may have picked up. Some things you may have picked up, and my tale on them, include: a. That the teen years are too young for anything to do with sex and that being sexual (including getting horny) is something that should magically start upon becoming an adult. This is absolute nonsense. Puberty, and the increase in sex hormones that happens during puberty, is what turns us from non-sexual children into people with sexual feelings, i.e. who get horny. That doesn’t mean we need to rush into having sex, but we can’t just pretend puberty isn’t happening/didn’t happen. b. That masturbation is an addiction to be fought, like smoking tobacco or snorting coke. Whilst it can be hard to resist, it is not an addiction in that sense as, unlike those, it is not harmful and the drive comes from within, not from previous experience or peer pressure. c. That because the biological purpose of sperm is to get a woman pregnant and thus continue the species, ejaculating any other time is an abuse and should be avoided. This is also not true: sperm cannot be saved up for some future date when we want to become a father, as they have quite a short life. Even those who go on to become fathers cum thousands of times intending no-one to get pregnant for each time they do make someone pregnant. All abstinence would do is deprive us of pleasure and leave us tense and frustrated. d. That masturbation saps our energy. Certainly, in the period I mentioned, just after cumming, we may not have much “get up and go”, but this is fairly short lived and is something to be enjoyed. Sometimes we need to experience contentment. Other than that, sperm and semen production is continuous so we cannot save the body any effort by abstinence and the exertion of getting to orgasm is good for us. Some of the negative views also have a connection with religion.

Sean2001 Thank you for this, I really appreciate it, it is gonna be hard to get myself out of the negative views of masturbation and sexuality in general but I will try. And yeah I think a lot of it stems from the fact that I grew up smack dab in the middle of utah where literally everybody is mormon, and even though I myself have decided to not join the religion and I have decided its not what I believe in, it still affects me, I think all those harmful christian beliefs have been completely drilled into my head, at one point it got so bad that I would pray and repent to god after I masturbate even though I know how fucking ridiculous that is I still couldnt help it, I dont even believe in hell or anything yet I was still repenting, and repenting for something that isnt even bad. But if I ever wanna be okay with masturbation and if I ever want to feel good after instead of being guilty I know I have to stop watching porn. Its just too gross for me, I need to find another way to make it exciting without watching that, I have tried to find some ways to make it better for myself but idk what they could be. do you have anything that works?

try reading erotic stories? Also there’s lots of porn that’s not gross. I dunno what kind of shit you’re watching…

BlackParadePixie Nothing its not that what im seeing thats disgusting its what goes on behind the scenes that is fucked up

ive tried to watch animated porn instead because then theres no possibility that its harming real people but it just seems so stupid and like 90% of it is an anime artstyle and I hate that

Why not just look up some lingerie models or something, and jack off to those?

I dont really get it you dont have to watch that stuff when you do that you can do it without looking at anything

Chloe ive been doing it with something for so long if I do it without it just feels kind of lonely and depressing, idk I just wish I was old enough to do it with a real person😔

idk_what_to_make_my_username Oh I’m sorry I didnt mean to make you feel sad when I wrote that I was just confused about what you meant

Masturbation Deppression?? idk what to call this post

idk_what_to_make_my_username

Caycedilla im literally not what the fuck

BlackParadePixie

WHAT THE FUCK BRO

Caycedilla

OMG LIKE

WTF BRO

idk_what_to_make_my_username

Caycedilla huh
what are you saying this to😭

idk_what_to_make_my_username

Caycedilla honestly though why did you start attacking kids for having curiosity, I get some of these people might be pedos but thats the shit like “trade nudes with me??” not this.

BlackParadePixie

Where do you think the “trade nudes with me” starts?
On forums like this…

idk_what_to_make_my_username

BlackParadePixie ik… But im not like that I can see its pretty obvious some of the other kids here are js mentally ill like me💔
but that doesnt make them little perves and idk why they started attacking everyone

Naturelover

“Deppression” ????

In German “Depp” means - stupid/fool/idiot

Falcons_11D

Naturelover Depp is also close to the English word “Dope” which is a pejorative name for a stupid person, an Idiot. or fool.

idk_what_to_make_my_username

Naturelover WOWWW!!!! nobody cares.

idk_what_to_make_my_username

i might delete my account, this forum randomly got extremely toxic out of nowhere and frankly I dont feel like having a bunch of ppl trying to put me down for my personal problems that im trying to get help with, im already fucking suicidal this isnt what i need rn.

Chloe

idk_what_to_make_my_username I think its because of all the weird posts going on right now there are so many so its hard to tell which ones are real and which ones are fake

idk_what_to_make_my_username

this guy is the real creep why have they said like nothing but just liked any post remotely related to sexual stuff thats really creepy

idk_what_to_make_my_username

image*

FeLiX

i can get it up without porn

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